Saturday, September 26, 2009

In The Fox Truck

"Game possibly about to end, prepare shot of Jeter...."

"But, uh, boss, Jeter had nothing to do with any of his team's runs in..."

"Get that camera trained right on his calm eyes, now! The most important thing is cutting to him at shortstop--in fact, I don't care if you cut off the last pitch to get the shot."

"But, uhhh, he's just standing there--he hasn't done anything this inning, and all he did in the previous inning's rally was strike...."

"Don't you realize 10 million people are wondering what Derek Jeter is doing right now, get that camera on him and wait for my cue!"

"But, uhhhh, don't you think they're worried more about what happens on the pitch, and if they do get the last out, maybe a shot of someone integral to the outcome of the game, or at the very least, the pitcher, or a player involved in the final play, whoever it ends up being?"

"Okay, last strike, last strike, get me Jeter quick before you miss the fist pump you moron!"

"Duhh, okay, boss...."

"Ahhhhh. Now put that Derek Jeter mask back on and get back on your knees!"

Friday, September 25, 2009

Crazy If You Let It

On NESN games at the Stank Tank, there's always this annoying, constant hruuuuuuuuuuu. This isn't just my TV, is it?

We got off to a great start, when Bay had the ball in very shallow left with Jeter just hitting third, and he made no attempt to easily throw him out by 30 feet. There was also no talk of "a win here is key as a sweep is almost mandatory if the Red Sox want to win the division." Instead it was just the media's usual talk: there's no advantage to winning the division. Really? None? Okay, I'll just go back to sleep and you can tell me the Texas Rangers score.

Good thing Lester's not seriously injured. That woulda ganked.

Was it just me or were Don and Eck rooting for the Yanks (between nut-washings of them)?

After the loss we gotta win the next two and then...oh who cares, we're not trying and nobody cares anyway. We just better be ready when the ALDS starts. Every other team seems to be trying....whereas we're being cautious but still end up with pitchers lying on the mound in pain.


It was a bit of a wild hog chase, but I got some playoff tickets. I am psyched! (If you don't know what number you're supposed to be calling....well, feel free to e-mail me.)

Viral Christ

You know that long basketball shot video? Terrible job by those guys. The whole thing is a Jesus ploy. They're promoting some organization that helps kids get out of "spiritual" poverty, then tries to prevent AIDS by NOT teaching the kids about safe sex because it goes against the bible. Don't be fooled!

Red Sox vs. Arachnids, 7.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Shinin' The Light In My Face And For What?

When you say "so he's got that goin' for him," you might be quoting the "so I got that goin' for me" line from Caddyshack, but more likely you've just heard others say it and you've picked up on the phrase.

But when you add "which is nice," as Sean Casey just did on the telecast, you're definitely quoting Caddyshack. In a wacky twist, during the previous commercial break I checked the guide thing, and found that CMT was showing...Caddyshack. I wonder if, like, me, El Alcalde is watching during the breaks...

Red Sox lead 4-0 in the 6th. I'd guess I'm gonna update this post.

Update, 11:48: With a little help from the porous KC infield, we get a 10-3 win that was briefly in doubt in the eighth. Great job by HH tonight. Know what I like? That there's a better chance of the Red Sox doin' some clinchin' this weekend than there is of the Yanks doing it. (I can't seem to write that sentence the way I want to, but you know what I'm saying.) Know what I don't like? When Victor Martinez doesn't hustle. I still don't know why Manny was always called out for this, yet no one else ever does. Meanwhile, Lowell has actually been known to not run out a double play ball, Papi rarely even reaches first on a groundout, and Victor--right when he got here he thought he had a homer and didn't run on a ball that stayed in the park. I gave him the BOTD, but since then I've seen him do it over and over. Tonight in the first inning, high pop to center, guy dives for it--at this point you should be rounding first. When the guy misses it, and is lying on his stomach while the ball rolls away, that's when you trot into second. Instead, Victor's still on first. I really like what the guy has done for us and I want to love the guy, but for some reason he just doesn't wanna run. The playoffs are coming, let's just all run out every ball, please. Can't hurt.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Finally We Beat The Royals. So...

In these three days where we were supposed to make the 5-game deficit smaller, we made it bigger. With the win tonight, though (our 90th), we still have a chance to make it 5.5 going into the three-game series at the New Loo.

Did you notice the Royals added the little brick wall behind the plate? Because there's nothing more unique than doing what everyone else does. I've been saying this for quite some time now, but I'll say it again: The reason we ended up with "cookie cutter stadiums" in the 70s is because everybody did the same thing. Hence the name. It doesn't matter how cool the template is, if everyone uses it, it's not cool at all anymore. (I do like that Kaufman Stadium, and it looks like they did a nice job re-doing it overall, though I still say Royals fans would have preferred to have all that money go players.)

What was Billy Wagner wearing under his jersey? Looked like a "Property of..." T-shirt, with green letters. Maybe an Eagles shirt he picked up in Philly? Why do I care?

The Reds became the 18th team in 2009 to score every total from 0-13. Yes, I'm still keeping track.

25 Guys, 24 Cabs. 1 Chariot.

From looking at various news sources on the Web today, I've concluded that the Yankees didn't clinch a playoff spot, only Derek Jeter did.

Now I've Seen Everything

Shy of an article about a Yankee win topped with a picture of Jeter sitting at home clapping at the TV set, this is about as Jete-gregious as it gets. That has to be a joke, right? Antics at the sports desk? I mean, to make the main picture in an article, you are pretty much required to have done something that would make the honor deserved, right? I don't think I've ever seen anything like, "Fan takes smoke break while Brewers players help rescue grandmother trapped under tarp." Because a picture of a random guy standing there would have nothing to do with said incident, right?

Anyway, for anyone who heard WEEI's daily berating of callers who actually want the Red Sox to, you know, TRY, I'd like to let you know that I'd just flipped over from the FAN, and not ten seconds earlier heard Mike Francesa confirm with Joe Girardi that the Yankees would be giving their all that night in Anaheim. The best part was when one of those EEI guys said, "believe me, the Yankees aren't pushing themselves either!" When, again, I'd JUST heard their manager say they WOULD be. And they won, and we lost.

And what is all this resting and non-trying getting us? Bay gets the flu. Drew walks up to manager and says he's achy and can't finish the game even though there aren't any players left. Youk misses a whole series. Victor Martinez stops in Cleveland on his trotting way to first. Nick...Green...has... ... deadleg! Did David Ortiz punch him in the leg and say "deadleg!" and it actually worked? Is Ellsbury gonna go on the DL with a Purple Nurple? A Titty Twister for Tek? What the fackin' fack?

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Yanks Give Sox Division, Sox Say No Thanks


aka shit

Monday, September 21, 2009

Horse Patch

You walk more than TEN batters, you're probably gonna lose. Even if you once had a huge lead. Put this one in the category with the big blown lead in Baltimore and the three-run ninth-inning blown lead against Oakland at home.

But hey, TC's not sad, the only thing he cares about is the Texas Rangers! Instead of constantly referring to them as the "team who wouldn't go away" (they were never even there, Tom), how about talking about the Red Sox as being the team who never goes away in the division race! Maybe tonight's loss shows what happens to teams are told to be complacent. I can't blame the offense--except for a few times when guys didn't slide or run balls out or get thrown out on the bases....

It was weird, though, how earlier you were almost rooting for our innings to end to make sure the game went official. Pedroia getting thrown out on the bases seemed like the right play--the runs score and we move the game along. But then the game seemed like it was about 14 innings long.

I'm very pissed right now but even more pissed about the fact that the folks in the organization and at NESN just don't seem to give a fuck. Here's a Texas update! Who the hell cares??

The Yanks now trail 3-0. Hopefully we can keep it at five GB, 4 in the loss. But we should have won tonight. I wish the Rangers were a game ahead of us, so I could know that we'd be going all out till the end of the season. You want to go into the playoffs without having slept through the previous two weeks. You want to have home field advantage. You want to have just demoralized your rival. And I know tomorrow morning I'll realize that we can win from the WC spot as we and many teams have before, but I'm pissed right now goddamn it! Why do I get the feeling if we do tie the Yanks, they'll be throwing Mo out there for a six-out save on the final weekend, while we'll be saying, Hey, it doesn't matter, we're already in... I just hate that attitude in general.

Update, 12:05 AM: We go to the 8th, 4-1 Angels. They have to hold on to give me some sleep tonight.

12:28 AM: So I flipped on the, saw the Angels get a run in bottom 8 to make it 5-2, and Scioscia's still pissed. He had a right to be, as Rivera, who hit the RBI double, jogged to first assuming the ball was gone. Scioscia pinch-ran for him.... Anyway, Saunders has a three-run lead as they go to the ninth.

12:44 AM: Yanks lose. We should have gained a game tonight. Easily. The good news is the Yanks are 4-6 in their last ten. We play three more and they play two more before we play each other. Five back, four in the loss.


Well maybe the Yanks did feel the pressure since they squandered a chance in the first, and then Pettitte gave up two in the bottom half....but we blow our entire lead. 9-9, still in the 6th.

Make it 11-9 KC. Fack.

What We're Sposed Ta

We needed to come out right away and get a big lead to put the pressure on the Yanks before their game starts--and the baseball gods smiled upon us by putting Lenny DiNardo on the opposing mound. I love Lenny, but I can't say I fear him.

And before you can say "seemingly insurmountable 3-0 ALCS lead," we've got a 6-0 lead. Poor Lenny, they didn't even arch his name on the back of his uniform.

Gotta hold on to this. I wanna be 4 games back!

WaterFire 9/19/09 Pix

All pics by me, at Saturday's WaterFire in Providence. Above, Kim's shoes. Click to enlar'.

Let me guess, Anonymous, I know nothing about photography, Photoshop, Providence, pyrotechnics, or alliteration, and you came here for Red Sox stuff, so I should stick to what I know?

Bonus pic: A plate I made in 1981. The deal was that I did my drawing of myself, and the teacher said I should fill in the white space around me, so I just drew a bunch of lines and shapes. Did I show you this before? Either way, my mom dug it up and gave it to me, so I'm once again eating off it. Calzones!

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Dirty Inner Harbor Water

"This guy threw a Berken at us! He doesn't even understand baseball!"

Another win against the O's. We finish 16 and freakin' 2 against them. I love how every day in this current stretch we play before the Yanks. Every time we win, they go into their game knowing they can't gain ground. Kinda key when they're the ones clinging to a lead. It goes until Tuesday, then they finally play a day game Wednesday, while we play at night and then play on Thursday while they rest. So we gotta just keep putting the pressure on them through Tuesday and then take it from there.

Again we can cut it to 5, 4 in the loss today--the Yanks already trail 2-0 early, but that's to be expected when shitty Joba breaks the hill.

And I don't get it--why wouldn't we want to take on the central champ and have the Yanks play the Angels who they always have trouble with? And all this with home field advantage throughout? That's NOT important enough to fight for? The goal is not to make the playoffs, it's to win in the playoffs. So make give yourself the best chance to win there! I'm not saying bring in Papelbon in the 8th up by 4 against KC, but come on, let's play our normal game and go for this thing!

I'll keep it right here since Joba's in a bases-loaded jam....and he walks in a run! 3-0 us. It's already the second inning, Girardi, might wanna take your boy out, haha! And now a sac fly makes it 4-zip. Nice job once again, Joba.

Update, 2 seconds later: Griffey gets an "in play, run(s)," and I say, Tell me it's a fucking home run that goes 500 feet, as I wait....and it IS a dong! Hahahahaha! Joba!!!! 7-0 Mariners! Still very early. But still very awesome!

Update, 7:01 PM: Mariners win 7-1. On September 8th, I said if we cut the lead to five by the Yanks series (which starts this Friday), we have a shot at the division, provided we then sweep them. Well, we're already five back, with four games to play before the Yanks series. AJM noted after the games on the 10th that we'd have to go 13-0 and the Yanks 8-4 to get to five back by then. Since then, we've gone 8-1 and the shitty Yanks have gone 4-5, turning the 9-game lead to 5 already, and we've got four in KC while they have three in Anaheim. So that would suggest we'll be even closer than five by Friday, but we shall prov. see. The tough thing about trying to overcome a big lead with little time left is the fact that one bad day sets you back largetime. So we gotta just keep plowin' through these bad teams....


I don't like hockey--never got into it. But even if I loved hockey, I'd still be pissed at the guy who sat in the front row at Fenway a few weeks ago with Bruins gear and a "Let's Go Bruins" sign. Because he was clearly one of those people who saw one bad loss and said, "season's over!" (Yes, another person who has completely missed the last few years of Red Sox baseball.)

And now, NESN, who shows Bruins games, too, has used that moment from that Sox game as an ad for Bruins hockey! Pisses me off.

BUT, in a nice twist, if you look closely at the guy's girlfriend's shirt, it says "I'm with stupid."

Disclaimer for hockey fans: Again, I'm not making fun of your sport, just people who are dumb enough to think that a bad week in July means the Red Sox are going to lose every single game till the end of time.)

Red Sox at O's, a few minutes from now.


I'm starting to wonder if one of my many "Yankee-fan commenters whose comments don't go through but they keep writing me every over and over" is just a joke. This guy updates me on the magic number, but only when it changes. Classic Yankee fan--it's as if he lives in some kind of cocoon, where no one ever sees him, unless something good happens for his team. Then he comes out and basks in the sun until the next bad thing happens, at which point he withers up and disappears again.

On top of that stereotypical Yankee fan behavior, he also has no idea how to spell words or make complete sentences. That's why I think it's just a joke, because I couldn't do a better job of making up fake "average anonymous dumbass fairweather Yankee fan" comments myself.

Someone should really do a psychological study on this. These people, in their minds, are always on top. Every time they speak, it's to make fun of that moment's positive thing. If anything negative happens, just disappear, simple as that.

(Also, the fact that he's this excited about the thought at winning the division, especially when both teams are making the playoffs anyway, combined with a complete lack of English skills, tells me might just be some 17-year old kid who can't remember the last team his team won the World Series and thinks them beating the big, bad Red Sox out in the east would actually count as achieving a goal. How much you wanna bet, if the Yanks win the east but we win the World Series, he STILL comes around bragging about that coveted division championship? After a four-month hibernation period, of course.)

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