Like I said, they're rarely easy, these big games--but it's a good sign when you can win a nail-biter by five runs!

How key was the Varitek dong?? And Cabrera with the hit of the game. And Pedro, no surprise at all to me, did fine.

But all I heard and read today was how the "never-say-die yanks" "found a way" to win again in a "classic comeback." Terrible. They won because: Nathan couldn't find the plate for two at bats; The Twins have fallen into what I call "Timo Perez syndrome"--thinking some rookie you brought up at the All-Star break is gonna be a star in the playoffs just because he had a few good months, meanwhile, when they're in yankee Stadium in October, you know they're gonna be swinging at pitches over their head like the Little Leaguer that they are, when all the team needs is a fly ball!!!!; and

Oh yeah, Jacque Jones is a fucking moron. At first I was ready to make fun of his pathetic, half-assed attempt at a throw to the plate from VERY shallow right field. But then I heard that he said he "wasn't thinking about Derek Jeter on the play." You know, if these teams had any brains at all, maybe nobody would ever have brought up the term "yankee mystique." Who the hell was he thinking about, the guy on first??? I heard someone on the radio today say that either way, Jeter scores on that play. I say give ANY outfielder in the history of baseball that play, and they gun the guy out by ten feet. (Without using the cutoff man. Grrrrrrr.)

And I feel really bad for people who have ESPN, but NOT ESPN2, because they missed the first HOUR AND A HALF of the Sox game due to the yanks going extras. You'd think this would be organized a little better--actually, this seems about right.

And can ESPN stop showing artsy angles and just show me the game. When they show a pitch from up behind the plate, WE CAN'T TELL WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON.

I had a feeling that those clueless yankee fans (at least the ones I work with) would be under the impression that THEY were the ones who stayed up late last night. I was right. When I got to work, I told one of them how tired I was, and they said, "Oh right, cuz of extra innings." Eh, actually, no. When your game ended at *eleven thirty*--poor thing--I then watched seven more innings of baseball, before going to bed at 2 am.

But it's okay! We're up 2-0! If the yanks wanna squeak out some more magical bullcrap wins, fine, bring 'em on!
We are so ready for those bastards this year. (But in the meantime, Go Twins!)

"From the Delta yankee press booth, Hello, everybody, welcome to Ricoh yankees baseball! Along with Budweiser's Jon Sterling, I'm Pepsi's Charlie Steiner. That greeting was brought to you, as always, by American Greetings. According to the Longines scoreboard, it's 7:19. That time check is brought to you by Timex. And that means it's time for the Johnson & Johnson first pitch. So I give you Budweiser's Jon Sterling. That announcer trasfer was brought to you by careerbuilder.com."

"Thanks, Pepsi's Charlie, and good evening everybody! Before we start, we'd like to remind everybody about Ricoh. With their patented Scan Square technology, only Ricoh can give you the quality you need. Visa's Derek Jeter steps in to the Yahoo.com batter's box, and the Johnson & Johnson first pitch is at Jeter's Spandex knee guard, but it's called a ball."

"You know Bud's Jon, Jeter really sold that call, that's why he's headed to the Compaq Presario Baseball Hall of Fame. When you have something to sell, click on ebay.com. Ebay. Bring other people's junk home."

"And Pepsi's Charlie, we understand that Visa's Derek has just sold the rights to his intangibles to 1800Flowers.com...."

That's not that far off from reality, people.

The yankee press booth really does have a sponsor.

You know what else is funny, and makes me realize that Sterling is a complete phony? When he does commercials--Ricoh, the LA Weight Loss Diet--he acts like he's describing some legendary baseball player. It's really bad. He's got, like, that loud whisper. And three second pauses between sentences. "Scan Square tecnology..........puts Ricoh......in the WORLD...SERIES......" He's so full of himself.

Pedro will come through tonight. Leiber will not.

That's right, Dangerfield is dead. My favorite line of his was from when he was on the Simpsons. And you won't laugh unless you know the scene, but the line was, "What state?!"

Anyway, I was wrong when I said the yanks were the Fox game tonight and tomorrow. They're on ESPN tomorrow, but I was right that they're on in prime time both nights.

How sweet is it when the yanks get shutout, despite having baserunners in almost every inning. Fox continued the tradition of showing Jeter's face in the dugout for absolutely no reason. Also, Jeter's standing on the top step failed to make the team score any runs tonight. Ha! I heard Sterling and Steiner on the postgame. It was just one excuse after another out of them. Pathetic. They said Mussina did his job, and Gordon and Rivera did theirs. Wrong. Gordon and Rivera's job is to hold a lead. It's not to have their arms get wasted in a playoff game where the yanks are losing.

About that yankee bullpen. Okay, at the beginning of the year, Jim Kaat claimed that Quantrill and Gordon were the two most important pickups the yanks made in the offseason. Then, every other member of the media decided this was a true fact. I predicted that they'd both fizzle out, and not be a factor by the end of the season. I was wrong about Gordon, but right about Quantrill. (Recently, Michael Kay said how Quantrill's doing so poorly, and there's no one else to blame for it. Kay said, "He's just pitching poorly, I can't think of any other way to spin it." Which tells you a LOT about Kay right there.) Anyway, the plan was: Starter--6 innings, Quantrill, Gordon, Rivera--7th, 8th, 9th innings. Now that Quantrill's out of the mix, the yankee announcers just act like he was never there: "If the starter can just go seven and have a lead, the game is over." Well, beside the fact that no yankee starter consistently goes seven and has a lead, it's just pathetic that they act like this is how they wanted it all along, when they used to only need the starter to go six. And now that Sturtze is doing fairly well, they act like they've got this incredible "bridge" to Gordon and Rivera. It's all just crap. And the yanks are going down. And all this will be commpletely irrelevant when they're sitting at home, watching the Red Sox and Twins in the ALCS.

I wonder if Fox could get a camera set up in Jeter's house so we could still see his reaction to every play he has nothing to do with.

If you happen to be a new Red Sox fan, or if you're only like eight years old, just know that pressure-free playoff wins like today's are VERY rare. Remember this day.

I think we're in good shape. Especially since Pedro goes tomorrow, and the New York media has convinced the world that Pedro's "done." I want a sweep (even though I've got tix to Game 4.)

The yankee game just started. Oh what a joy it is to see those wonderful suits taking up all the seats behind home plate. Man, what the frig is up with those people? Get your god damn suit off before you enter a baseball stadium. Why don't people want to wear comfortable clothes at a baseball game? Your meeting is over! You've made enough money today, rich boy! Put on some sweats, or jeans, or something. We know you're richer than us already.

And I don't even need to mention how the yanks are in Prime Time every time they play. (Making the rest of us have to miss parts of games because we're still at work, or stay up 'til two am.) And those are the only Fox games. So if you don't have cable, anywhere in America, you're considered a yankee fan, because that's all you're getting for a while.

That's what some kid asked me while I was on line at Stop & Shop. I was like, "Uhh, there was a time...." (I watched my fair share of Headbanger's Ball as a teen.) He said he had tickets to a show and needed people to go. I asked which band. He said, "Napalm Death". Even if I was some huge ND fan, would I go with some stranger who looks for other death metal fans on line at the grocery store? No, I wouldn't.

That reminds me--on the Saturday Fox game, Remy announced the game along with a Baltimore announcer. They were talking about how Keith Foulke comes out of the 'pen at Fenway to the song "Mother" by Danzig. (which I've written about here before.) I was shocked when Remy said how he hadn't even noticed that Foulke's come in the game to the same song for a while now. And I was also shocked that neither announcer had heard of the song OR Danzig. Don't people know about Danzig? The Misfits?? Come on, America.

The Sox almost did what I thought they might--finally sweep a series against Baltimore...when it didn't matter. And ever since I made that "Wouldn't ya know it"-type statement, I've been wondering--is the pessimistic side of me coming out, just in time for the playoffs? Let's hope not. But hey, if it starts workin' for me...

Go here to read an on-line article about my two-man band. And if you're in the Danbury, CT area, listen to us on 91.7 FM on Sunday, Oct 3rd, at 6 PM.

In other news, F the yanks.

The magic number is --.

Fortunately, in this wild-card society we live in, you can win the World Series without winning your division.