Thursday, December 23, 2010

Robe Diss

I pulled up to the pump at the gas station. Got out, started to go through the routine, complete with mandatory scoffing at the price, as if this will catch the owner's eye and lead him to find it in his heart to take a loss and cut his prices in half through the holidays. The minivan at the pump in front of me hadn't moved by the time I began to feed that delicious oil to my Hyundai. Finally I see its gas tank cover pop. I didn't know why it had taken that person that long to get to that point, but no one else was waiting for that pump, so whatever. The driver gets out. He's in his twenties, scruffy, winter hat, sneakers. Pretty much your average American eighteen-ta-thirtyfiver.

Except for the bathrobe he had on over his clothes.

I put my very best "I don't see anything out of the ordinary in my general vicinity" look on my face, finished pumping my gas, and drove away. I guess the question is, Did I disappoint him? What kind of reaction was he hoping for? Was he in shock that I didn't make some type of face, or give some indication that I recognized his abnormal wardrobe? Or did he think I was great for not outwardly judging him? You can't wear a bathrobe over your clothes and not expect people to either react or consciously avoid reacting, right? At least not when you're outside the Ironic College District, which we were.

Or am I missing something? Are "outdoor bathrobes" on sale right next to the Whalers T-shirts?


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Location: Rhode Island, United States