Thursday, November 11, 2010

"Another Night Of Just Hangin' Out, And Doin' Whatever I Feel Like"

When I did some mocking versions of YouTube card pack-openings, I tried to be funny. I quickly realized that the seriousness of the real openings are funnier than I could ever be. It's kind of like trying to do a spoof of Juggalos--you could do a great job, but nothing's gonna be as funny as the real thing is, despite the fact that the real thing isn't supposed to be funny.

Enter "C William G." This dude opens packs of cards, but he's not a nerdy teenager, and he's not a serious "collector/speculator." He's in his 30s, has a wife/kid/job in the Chicagoland area. He decided recently to get back into baseball cards (that 2010 Topps set really helped a lot of people in that way), so he started buying old packs and opening them up. But unlike the other pack-crackers, C William G is just hanging out late at night, drinking beer, listening to music, and reminiscing about old, worthless cards that he picked up for cheap at Target on the way home from work.

I just kind of laughed at him at first, but I've come to respect him. He's a smart guy and he really cares about all this stuff and doesn't give a crap what you think. He eventually started doing weirder things in his vids--driving around the wilderness in a truck, showing his collections of VHS tapes and old gaming systems, going to old burned-out buildings, and opening plenty of non-sports cards....I realized he's a lot like me. (The notable exception being I never drink and he's never not drinking.)

So I urge you to get on the ground floor of the C William G videos. As of now, I'm still one of a handful of people watching him. Sift through his stuff, there are plenty of gems in there. Some vids are just straight openings, but every once in a while he'll surprise you with something off the wall, somehow without ever changing the volume or tone of his voice.

My recommendation is to go to the 12:20 mark of this video, and watch from the point when he starts talking about the back scratcher. He suddenly cuts into his description of the things in his closet with a sort of odd summation of his feelings toward this whole pack-opening-on-camera lifestyle that he's found himself in. And it's hilarious. I'm still unsure if he knows how funny he is.

You forgot to mention when he took the bullet and stopped the assassination of Franz Ferdinand in Sarajevo in 1914, thus preventing World War I from occurring (as well as preventing the formation of an indie rock band). Jetes was ok, though; as usual his uncanny intangibles and expert positioning made up for his complete lack of range and allowed him to deflect the bullet with nothing more than a flesh wound. Fist pump!
AJM's above comment was supposed to go on a different post--but it fits in with the randomness of C Willam G.

Funny how I credited 2010 Topps with getting a lot of people back into collecting--C Willy just compared the set to his least favorite of all time--89 Topps! Wonder what that's all about...

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Location: Rhode Island, United States