Saturday, September 26, 2009

In The Fox Truck

"Game possibly about to end, prepare shot of Jeter...."

"But, uh, boss, Jeter had nothing to do with any of his team's runs in..."

"Get that camera trained right on his calm eyes, now! The most important thing is cutting to him at shortstop--in fact, I don't care if you cut off the last pitch to get the shot."

"But, uhhh, he's just standing there--he hasn't done anything this inning, and all he did in the previous inning's rally was strike...."

"Don't you realize 10 million people are wondering what Derek Jeter is doing right now, get that camera on him and wait for my cue!"

"But, uhhhh, don't you think they're worried more about what happens on the pitch, and if they do get the last out, maybe a shot of someone integral to the outcome of the game, or at the very least, the pitcher, or a player involved in the final play, whoever it ends up being?"

"Okay, last strike, last strike, get me Jeter quick before you miss the fist pump you moron!"

"Duhh, okay, boss...."

"Ahhhhh. Now put that Derek Jeter mask back on and get back on your knees!"

Want to know what I think? I think you're just jealous because the Yankees are better than you as a human being. You can't take the fact that the Yankees are better than you personally. I hear you like those big lollipops too.

You and your Red Sox buddies are dorks too.

I just schooled you and taught you how to be a real man. Now, how does it feel?
It feels fabulous! Thank you so much!
FOX Truck:

"Pitcher, Catcher, Batter, Jeter. Crowd Shot, Jeter, Jeter's Parents, Jeter, Starlet, Field, Jeter, Tim Mc Carver, Jeter, A-Rod, Jeter, Posada, Jeter, Texiera, Jeter, a Toilet Shot, Jeter."

It could be White Sox at Indians & sure as s--t, a shot of Jeter.

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Location: Rhode Island, United States