Sunday, August 09, 2009

Swept By Trash

As we know, the Red Sox series is the Yankee fan's World Series, now that they don't win real World Series' anymore. In fact, any home run is cause for a parade in their current cursed era, which explains why every one gets a curtain call. The fact that most of them are half-wits doesn't help. It was fitting that tonight's win was made possible by two admitted steroid users, but then the fans chanted "steroids" at an opposing player. That's almost like playing your victory song when you lose! Oh wait, they do that, too.

Our scoreless streak was the longest one since a year before I was born. In the game in which we finally scored back then, in '74, Cecil Cooper knocked in the drought-ending runs, and was pinch-run for by Fred Lynn, making his major league debut.

I'm sure the average radio show caller thinks the season is over--they think that after any given loss--but I'm hoping sane Sox fans see that that's not the case. Our lineup is really good. It has hit shittily for a long stretch here, there's no question about that. But they'll be okay. The starting pitching is playoff-ready. It's not like we've lost six blowouts in a row. I just hope the people that have given up don't end up clogging my view at the parade, should there be one.

Did you see Shitface holding his bat up in the air while running to first on his home run? Was he trying to harness the power of Grayskull? Anyway, when we drill him in the next series, I hope it really, really hurts.

Jere, thanks for this. After this series, reading your post was just what I needed. Rest assured that I've neither given up nor have any hope of travelling to Boston to watch the parade, so that's one less body you'll have to worry about.

Was he trying to harness the power of Grayskull?

You should see how many spam comments I'm getting. They all sit quiet while their team shits, then they beat us in August and out they come. There's nothing more pathetic than a Yankee fan. I don't even read them anymore, but I do glance, and I see all the old tricks, including my favorite, "I'm not even a Yankee fan, but...." to attempt to trick me into thinking outsiders are looking at the series and thinking, Yay, the Yanks and their 400 million dollar spending spree beat your team, woohoo! Only a Yankee fan would pretend not to be one for any reason.

They do it to try to make me stop saying what I do, and in this case, the guy admitted it, with a "maybe now you'll stop..."

I can't wait till their season ends. I love laughing in their faces at the end of each season.

I still stand behind my theory that witnessing Yankee fans in the post-2004 era proves that it wasn't the 26 championships to our none since 1918 that made them arrogant and obnoxious...they were just like that anyway. (And it's always good to have a back-up team for when you're losing, like most Yankee fans do!)

Remember, in Yankee fans' minds, only the good parts stick. They have never lost a game, as far as they're concerned. I love how they play the victory song when they lose. That's the most fitting thing of all.
Oh, and maybe they'll print up T-shirts commemorating their August success, like they did in 2006. Another classic. Admitting "this is all we've got."

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Location: Rhode Island, United States