There was another Masquerade Ball tonight at Yankee Stadium. Once again, the most popular costume to show up in was an empty blue stadium seat. As I told you on Sunday, the Yanks knew nobody was coming to this series (other than the opening day game), which is why I got an email from them offering 48-dollar seats for 5 bucks each. (See that offer here among their other discounts, keeping in mind Fenway doesn't even discount obstructed view seats anymore.)

It was a cold night, sure, but if you buy tickets for a night game on April 2nd, you should be happy to get 44 degrees, which was the game-time temp. Granted, it was a little windy... But, hey, when you only pay $5 for a seat, you're gonna be more likely to go home early. Which is exactly what all the people who bothered to show up did.

During the game, seeing the nearly completely empty upper deck, I jokingly said, "you know they'll still announce the attendance as like 49,000 or something." I was close. 48,500. It's that's what 48 thousand people looks like, I should start a baseball team, 'cuz I'm 9 guys myself.

Anyway, the Dunbar faithful were sound asleep, dreaming of the past, which is when the Yanks' championships take place, and the future, where every Yankee young pitcher is scheduled to be a Hall of Famer simply because the Yankees say so, the team lost 5-2 to the Blue Jays. Giambi almost tied it in the ninth, but his three-run dong attempt fell just short. The only thing better than a Yankee loss is a Yankee loss where they almost win and the fans think it is pre-destined that they'll have some mystical America-protecting rally, but they still lose. (Oh, and the way they got the tying runs on was a TYR, typical Yankee rally. Jeter with a fisted ball to the second baseman who messes up the play, then Abreu gets a broken bat bloop. Had either of these "hits" involved the hitter retreating to the dugout, they surely would've been asked to do a curtain call, as Yankee fans have reached the point of thinking of anything good as, like, the best thing you could possibly ask for. Can I once again tell you how much I love the world we live in? Oh, but the "rivalry is stagnating," that's right, I almost thought I cared and got excited about the thought of the Yanks having every bad thing I could possibly imagine happening to them. Myyyyy mistake.)

Standings look like this: Us, 3-1, the other four teams, 1-1.

So, getting back to the empty seats thing. If fans don't wanna go to the game, fine. I just wish we didn't have to hear about how Yankee fans are the best in the world, and all these attendance records (and especially that Red Sox fans are somehow "the same" as Yankee fans.) Why don't the Yanks just do this: Give all the tickets away for free. See how many people show up. Add that number to the number of empty seats remaining for the total "attendance." Tell everyone that every game was played to a full house of paying fans. That's pretty close to what they already do....