Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Momma, I Can't Breathe

I just read in the Post that Roger Clemens' mom's last wish was for him to retire. I'm wondering now if it was her advice he's been following all along: "Remember, son, friends and loyalty and telling the truth are important, but, when in doubt, follow the money." In fact, maybe she told him to reire as her "dying wish" a few years ago, when he fooled Dunbar fans into thinking he was going out in a blaze of glory (where glory equals losing the World Series to the Marlins), but then she didn't die, so he kept playing. [Edit: I seriously am trying to avoid even talking about this, but for the record, I'm 100% against Roger coming anywhere near my team. It's just a rumor anyway, always has been. But, I'm just saying, put that money into some youth. I'm just never forgiving Roger. Not gonna happen. Ever.]

Johnny Damon's loyalty lies in an only slightly less confused place. He says his real loyalty lies with his family. (Read: so screw any other people who may consider me family.) I wonder how his dad's Vietnam battallion would have felt if he told them, "I've gotten a much better offer from the VC, so I'm gonna switch over and fight for them now. But thanks for everything, it's been an honor and a privelege. But--I'll still be loyal to my blood relatives, so it's okay."

And I didn't believe Michelle had anything to do with Johnny's moving to the Big Apple, formerly Fun City, but only because I don't live in Boston and am not constantly getting the wife updates lot a lot of you, but then I read that she's "enjoying fashion week" here in NYC with some friends. So, maybe it was partly her call. And I'm not one of those guys who thinks Yoko broke up the Beatles. I'm down with Ono.

They're talking about Varitek making the US WBC team like it's some new thing, but I saw Varitek USA shirts for sale at mlb shops a week ago. (I'm only looking because I want to get an Ortiz Dominican T-shirt, which I'm still waiting on.)

I heard from a Boston-area person that NESN showed a "classic" Red Sox game yesterday, one which the Sox lost to the Dunbar crew last season, in a pitching duel between Captain Tall 'N' Fugly and Tim Wakefield. Addd this to the '75 and '86 World Series' that were shown last winter on NESN, and that makes, well, several Red Sox past losses shown on NESN. I give them so much credit for this. The YES, aka HELL, NO Network will not so much as admit that the yanks have ever lost a game, let alone show an entire nine-inning loss, regardless of how "classic" the game was.

Comments:
Hey. You were all over the place, but that's alright. That's the beauty of this small space in the world of sanity. Some Yankee fans would stand up and disagree. Let 'em. I laugh. And Yoko did not break up the Beatles, but she sure as Hell accelerated the process ten fold.
 
At least she didn't sketch costumes for each of the Beatles based on their astrological signs.
 
Dobly.
 
oh yeah, that "loss" on "giambi's" 1st inning "home run"? what a fun memory.
 
I was on an Amtrak coming back to Boston after watching Schilling humiliate Al Leiter and the Yankees that previous Saturday while Wake was pitching the game of his life...that the Red Sox lost. People kept texting me with updates at the end of every inning until the 9th when I shut off my cell phone because I KNEW what was going to happen.

No matter. Tomorrow it all begins again.

Down with Dunbar, indeed!
 
Hey, long time first time Jere (haha, gawd, how I hate that phrase). I love how he says his loyalty is with his family but he dumped his wife and then married the stereotypical baseball players wife (blonde, big boobs, tan). Apparently, he didn't consider his first wife as part of his family.

My own personal wish is that the first time he is introduced at Fenway Park this season, there is no booing or cheering just complete dead silence. It'll never happen of course, but I can dream.
 
Dead silence is entirely underrated.
 
Truer words have never been spoken.
 
Dunbar Highlights must've stopped after 2004's Game 3 on "Nooooooooo."
It must still be 2000 for them. The Dunbars are still in the LAST century.
 

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