Thursday, December 22, 2005

Some People

Bob Ryan just doesn't get it. This article starts by telling Sox fans to give Johnny a standing O next season, prefacing it with the dreaded "show some class."

His reasoning seems to be: There was nothing unfair about what happened. (Yeah. So?) He was a really good player for the Red Sox. (Yeah. So?) Does he really think people are going to read his article and say, "Oh yeah...he was a good player. He did play by the rules. I'll cheer him as a member of the other team! I'll even cheer for his team to beat ours!"

Then he tries to compare this to Manny getting here the same way as Johnny left. As if Manny had been the star of the yankees before coming to the Red Sox.

Hey, Bob, your mom just divorced your dad and married the guy across the street--the one who used to molest you when you were little. But give credit where it's due. Give her a big hug. She always put food on the table for you, and she legitimately went through the divorce process and then had a nice legal wedding with Mr. Dunbar. She played by the rules. So show some fucking class when she and the new mister come over and have sex in your room.

Also, I had this fantasy that the yankee brass would end up wining and/or dining Damon here in NYC. And I'd find out where they were going and me and a hundred other Sox fans would go and hold up signs outside the window, telling him much we love him and want him to stay. And Johnny would give us all a wink over Cashman's turned back, letting us know he's just messing with the yanks. Then he'd sign with the Sox and we'd all live H.E.A.

It's just so disappointing how it went down. He didn't even see if the Sox could give him a better offer. (Note: any Red Sox offer would include clearance to grow hair on any part of the body if that's what one wanted, and fans who all already treat him like a god instead of ones who won't want him anyway because he stands against everything they represent.) It was just, "You wanna play for us?" "'Kay."

Very sad.

Note to homophobes: Go two paragraphs up for me talking about Damon winking at me! Gimme what you got! You may even impress some other homophobes and you could arrange to not hang out with them. Ever.

Comments:
Pedro wouldn't get booed during interleague play, even though he left the Sox for more money in New York. Because he went to the Mets, not the MFYs.
 
Now why did Damon leave the Red Sox when he was supposedly treated like a God? It's very simple, outside of Philly fans Red Sox fans are the most obnoxious collection of losers, idiots and lowlifes on the planet. All they ever do is whine and whine and whine. Even winning finally after 86 years didn't stop that. And maybe with alot of luck when they finally win again after another 85 years the curse of Johnny Damon will be lifted. And will that finally change the personalities of Sox fans? I doubt it. GOOOOO DBacks!!!
 
Either that, or the money.

But probably yours.
 
Your "Mr. Dunbar" analogy is, quite simply, amazing. Sums this whole deal up perfectly.
 
Bernie's washed up. Of course you wouldn't feel bad. George, Brian and Joe have squeezed every last bit of impressive playing out of that sponge. Actually, they still think he's got a little magic left in his batting helmet. Whatever.

On the other hand, how do you know how you would feel? It never happened (w/Bernie, I mean). It's easy to say good sportsmanship-y type things like that. Next time a Yankee icon and dude in his prime decides to play for the Sox (with no buffer team in between), come back and talk about how much you don't hate him. I'm sorry if that sounds rude, but the wound is still fresh.
 
Once you go Yank, you never go back.

David Wells eventually found his way to Boston but you know he'd somehow do a cartwheel to get back in pin stripes.
 
Jeez, the Yankee fans are just trying to get you going. Don't let it work! What's done is done. Look at their next year rotation and imagine what happened last year. I'm already smiling! Don't play into their unintellectualness (read as no brains) get to you.
 
Wow, I opened a huge door for ridicule of me....delete the last 3 words and add a period.
 
Look, now it looks like we're even. You guys just stole John Flaherty from right under our noses. How dare he go play in the shit hole!!

John Flaherty is like the Grinch who stole Christmas.
 
Don't sweat it Pete. I used the word "look" twice in four words. We know your literate based on your favorite books in your profile. In fact, we probably have quite a bit in common.
 

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