Thursday, July 28, 2005

I Scream, "Terrible Job!"

Number of times I've been inside a Cold Stone Creamery: 1

Number of times I've seen Tino Martinez inside a Cold Stone Creamery: 1

Number of times I said "terrible job" referring to the singing employees at Cold Stone Creamery: 7

Number of times they didn't give me what I ordered at a Cold Stone Creamery while Tino Martinez was in the store: 1

Number of times me and Tino Martinez lived in the same neighborhood while he made millions of dollars and I didn't even have a job: 1

Terrible job, Tino. Terrible job, Cold Stone. Terrible job, Chan.

Hey Jere,

Is this the Coldstone at 2nd Ave and 85th Street on the Upper East Side? The reason I ask is that my girlfriend lives near there (on 79th, in Jeter's old building, unfortunately) and she's heard that apparently Tino sometimes shows up at the diner a block from her. I've been in that Coldstone. I myself live in Stamford, near the Merritt, and ironically have my own Coldstone behind my place. No Tino sightings there.
That's the one. So Tino definitely lives around there, I'd say. So why'd Jeter leave?
Well, he lived in a penthouse in her building back when he was a rookie, he's since moved on to one of Trump's glitzy palaces down in the 40's on the East Side. Frankly, I'm glad I don't have to run into him in the elevator; I think my natural instinct to chant "No-mar's Bet-ter" would immediately kick in.

Only tangentially related, but we were in Martha's Vineyard a couple weeks ago, and saw Wakefield out with his family getting ice cream in Edgartown the night of the All-Star Game. It wasn't at a Coldstone though.

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Location: Rhode Island, United States