Thursday, June 02, 2005

Papi. Gold. Again.

These at-work games are crazy. Between being 3/4 asleep from my new reverse-commute schedule, and trying to keep track of the Red Sox on the 8-track of game-coverage, MLB Gameday, I don't know how I'm supposed to get any work done.

I get a ten-minute break in the afternoon, so I always have to choose my spot wisely, knowing that I can hear about a half an inning on my car radio. Today, I chose bottom-8 to go out there. I stayed in the car until the ninth, heard the O's take the lead, and then had to go back in, stuck "watching" Gameday for the bottom of the ninth.

One man on. Two out. Edgar bunts for a hit? Must be a mistake.

By the time Ortiz comes up, the imaginary crowd in my head is going wild. Three and one. Then, "Pitch 5: Foul." 3-2. And that foul could have been tipped, landing at his feet, or a home run-distance fly ball, just to the right of the pole, like in The Natural. Now Ortiz could be getting a new bat. "Pick me out a winner, Bobby."

The young Bobby Savoy brings out the bat he and Ortiz made together. "Savoy Special."

Come on, screen, say "home run". Say "home run"! Here's the pitch.

"Pitch 6: In play, run-scoring play."

Oh yeah, we're playin' with the house's money now. It's at least tied. The ball could be floating through the air, headed for the bleachers. Or it could be bouncing around the dugout after a bad throw, tying the game. No idea. Please tell me.

"Ortiz homers..."

That's all I need to read. I walk (past my boss, who has no idea that I'm jumping up and down in my mind) to the phone, knowing that I need to confirm this with someone who's actually watching the game. Rebecca tells me that it is real. Another amazing work-day afternoon, comeback, walkoff win.

Great job, Red Sox.

The yanks are one strike away from getting swept as I write this. By the worst team in baseball. The Royals announcers (I've got Gameday Audio on here) just said that the Royals have gone 78 series' without sweeping a team. Bernie's up. 3-2, 2 out. Kauffman Stadium chants "yankees suck," but the announcer says, "Crowd chanting 'sweeep'." Uh, not quite, sir. Bernie walked. Sierra is up. Station ID. WHB, my exlusive home of the Kansas City Royals.

Bases loaded. Royals up 3.

Come on, KC.

2-0. Crap. Throw strikes, man. 2-1 now. I hope he hits one to the warning track for a game ending out, just to excite Francesa for a moment. 2-2. Foul. Still 2-2. Hahhahahhahaha! It's over. yanks swept by Kansas City. So funny how all the arrogance came back, and it was totally assumed that the yanks would sweep. But they got swept.

Now can we all please not say things like, "Well, you know the yanks will snap out of it." I don't mean to get all Cossette-y on your ass, but just keep thinking that they're gonna lose. And that we're a great team who can't be held down for long. World Champs: We will win! World Chumps: They will lose! Positive thinking. We know it works. Stay focused. Okay, so we're cool, then? Sweet.

So it's June. Here's what's on tap for me: June 15th vs. Reds, Upper Bleacher. June 18th vs. Pirates, in the ten-game plan seats, section fo'-three. June 20 and 21: Jere goes to Ohio--at Cleveland, right field upper deck. June 24th: Jere goes to that weird state--at Philadelphia, forget where the seats are. Root for my camera to work, if you want to see pics from these games.

I've still got the Royals station on. There was an ad for Sonic, who has a contest, where you win something if the Royals hit an "over-the-wall" grand slam during a certain inning. What the H? Imagine how pissed you'd be, seeing an inside-the-park grand slam during the special inning, going up to claim you prize, and being told, "Sorry, sir, it has to go over the wall." (Also, if you're a woman, they'd have added insult to injury, with the whole "calling you 'sir'" thing.

Terrible job, Sonic.

Oh my god, I was just about to say how Suzyn Waldman said, while doing the out-of-town scores earlier, that Foulke "obviously blew the save in the top of the ninth." (Obviously false, Suzyn.) And now this Royals announcer says, during their score update, that the Red Sox won with three in the ninth, "two on a David Ortiz home run." This makes me really mad. With all this technology, how can these people get these facts wrong? It's ridiculous. That totally makes it sound like the game was already tied, and Ortiz hit a pressure-free homer. When in reality, we were a strike away from losing when Ortiz hit it out. It's a totally different thing. And on WCBS radio, they recently claimed that the Red Sox won, when they actually lost, on two separate days. I would've really been pissed if I hadn't known the result on one of those days, and heard them say the Sox won, and then walked around all happy, only to find out later that the news got it wrong. In one of those cases, the Sox lost 13-6, and WCBS said they won 6-2. Mind-boggling, really.

Speaking of that, check out this piece of crap article by Ron Borges, who, I kid you not, says, "Ghosts lurk everywhere inside old Fenway Park even this season..." Go die, dude.

That Borges article, speaking of getting the facts wrong, also tells us that the Orioles just took wo out of three from the Sox. Bet he got a fun surprise checking the scores tonight.
12/8: I was commenting on your blog as yours arrived in my email.

Yeah, since it was a make-up game, I guess I've got a lot of misinformation to look forward to tomorrow from all the news sources.
The writer of that article is an ass. Or a Yankees fan. Same difference.

Beautiful job by the Chokers tonight. Way to use that $200 million payroll, Boss! HAHA!
I listen to day games on radio at work. And to be honest, I don't even try to look busy. I work my ass off the rest of the time, so I guess I figure I'm entitled or something. Anyway, needless to say, my productivity declines severely when the Red Sox are playing.

You know, if he keeps doing this, teams are just going to stop pitching to Ortiz with the game on the line. And this time is classic because Baltimore even had the desirable lefty/lefty matchup -- fat lot of good it did them. Ortiz is a beast, simple as that. If you build it, they will come? Obsolete. The new mantra is, if you pitch it, Papi will hit it out of the mofo ballpark, game over.

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Location: Rhode Island, United States