Monday, May 30, 2005

52 Pick-Up

Tonight around 5:30, as my visiting parents and I were headed to the Riviera to watch the game, we spotted a family of Sox fans on the street. I gave then the double-point, and they acknowledged us. The father asked us, "Are you going to the game?" "No," we said, "we're going to watch it at a bar." He responded with, "Do you want to go to the game?"

He had three extras, and was selling them at face value.

An hour and a half later, we were in the upper deck, section 12, at Le Stade du Choque.

And aren't we glad we went...

Ortiz hit what had to be a total of 900 feet worth of home runs. Black seats! Probably my first black seats homer in person. Wells, despite giving up two homers in the first, was ON. Almost went the whole game. As opposed to Mussina, whose pitch count hit 80 by the third, and was quickly replaced by Wang. And Edgah! Yeah, dude, this is what we're paying you for. It was fun watching his and Ortiz' averages go up at the game. It's like a race to .300. And I got to see Shoppach's first major league at bat.

I was surprised to see that Wells was wearing 16 tonight. And Edgar was back to his old 3. So I guess Pat and a lot of other people got screwed, having bought the "Renteria 16" shirt. I had learned from BS Memorial why Edgar took 16, and we know why Wells took 3, so I checked over there, and of course BSM mentioned the number swap, but what's the deal? Why did they switch? Did ESPN say? (I also thought BSM would've mentioned Billy Crystal taking a FUCKING DO-OVER on the ceremonial first pitch. But I guess it was implied how sick that made him.)

So we had 52 hits in the series. The series that was supposed to be, as all but guaranteed by most, a sweep by the yanks. Terrible job. 52 hits! In three games. yankee fans, that's 17.3333333333333333333 hits per game.

But let me tell you my favorite thing about this series. There was a caller to the FAN on Friday morning, talking about when A-Rod will finally get that big hit against the Red Sox, and become a true yankee. His prediction was: A-Rod hits his 400th home run on Sunday night to win the game and complete the sweep.

So what makes me so happy is not just the fact that that guy probably cried himself to sleep tonight before Ronan Tynan left his pen to come out and sing his rock opera version of God Bless America, but that A-Rod, after his big lead up, with all those homers against shitty teams, still did not get his big hit. He is still not a true yankee. His body keeps rejecting the mystique! We're losing him! Clear!

And that ass made some key errors as a bonus. (But one wasn't called an error? What the shit?) A-Rod, thank you for giving me so much joy. You're like the yankee I never had. I mean, there were always yankees I'd make fun of: Bob Shirley, Paul Zuvella, Dale Berra, Dan Pasqua. But those guys weren't considered the best player in the game like you, A-Rod. You just know how to be "the best," while somehow NEVER doing anything to help your team when it matters, escpecially against my team. You're like a non-super hero. Oh, and has anyone called him "A-Freud" because of the therapy thing? He was definitely "E-Rod" tonight. (Thanks for that one, Frank.)

Here's another bonus. The following ex-yankee pitchers pitched--and won--today alone:

Chris Hammond
Jake Westbrook
Brandon Claussen
Jeff Weaver
Andy Pettitte...
and David Wells

Now that I live in New York, I actually have a home subway to root for in yankee Stadium's "Great Subway Race," one of the many bullshit between inning activities they have. My 4 train lost to the B. Also, do they have to play sound effects and music between every single pitch?

Great weekend. Lots of Sox fans everywhere. Got to go to a game unexpectedly, and it was a nice win. We head home for a slumping Baltimore, with a chance to take over first place. I got to chat with the guy who sold us with the tix, and it turns out he's from Vermont, and despite living in Jersey, has season tickets to Fenway. That's hard core. Thank you, Frank, for the tix!

From today's Indy 500: "Lady & gentlemen, start your engines!" Cool.

I guess just from reading stuff on and stuff, even though he technically started at #16, he ultimately wanted #3 back, and since he'd sucked balls with it so far, Wells was finally ready to give it back up. Weird.

And yea, that Crystal thing was fucking vomitacious.
Apparently Edgah had to pay a sizable amount of cash to Wells to ransom his number back, though...

A-Freud. Ay gavult. How did I fail to think of that one? :P
Eh. A-Rod hooked Wells up with some shrinkage, which helped him deal with his unhealthy Ruth fixation. Also, some hypno-therapy for the weight problem.

It's the only explanation, I think.
Shoppach's first at bat was on Saturday, he got hit by a pitch.
Eh, I meant first PA. Sunday was his first official AB. You were luckier still to miss Joe Morgan announce on Sunday night, he openly roots against the Sox.
Seeing this game in person must've been like visiting the Mysterious Cities of Gold. As the owner of a "Renteria 16" t shirt, I'm gonna write him and ask for a replacement, or my $18.99 back. And he better not give me any of that "now it's a collector's item" horsecrap, either. I've always maintained that Reteria's gonna be good, and I want the right number, for Christ.

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Location: Rhode Island, United States