I'm sorry, did you say "yankee Ice Tray Night?" I wonder how many fans were thinking about going to a yankees game, originally decided against it, but then (!) said Oh my god, if I trek to the Bronx tonight, spend 150 bucks for the tickets for the family, park for 20 bucks, walk underneath the dank highway overpasses, through the pee-smelling walkway with the guy that plays the Flintstones theme on his trumpet really loud, pay 7 bucks for a beer, and 50 more dollars for food for everyone, stand in even more pee in the bathroom, and cheer whenever the scoreboard tells me to, I GET A FREE ICE TRAY.

But it's only for the first 18,000 fans, so get in the car quick everybody! Actually, kids, you don't get an ice tray because you have to be 21 or over. Maybe you could borrow your mother's. But don't even think about touchin' mine.

Is this what they mean when they say Steinbrenner's a great businessman?

Anyway, it's quite a shame that I don't have a light bulb key ring....