Sunday, November 21, 2004

What's On Your List?

From the following list, select the choice that is most likely the reason why the Red Sox won the World Series in 2004.

A) Jere claims that "this is the year" back in March, despite knowing full well that he's thought that about every other year since as far back as he can remember, always with disappointing results.
B) Jere picks up dirt from the Fenway warning track in November on a tour and puts it in that little inner pocket of his jeans, so that even when the jeans get washed, the dirt stays deep in the pocket.
C) Jere carries around a paint chip from a Fenway seat in his wallet all season.
D) Jere & Pat listen to "Since You've Been Gone" by the horrible 80s metal band Impelliteri on the way to every Sox game they attend during the season.
E) Jere refuses to buy "Yankee Doodles" from the candy machine at work all season, even when he reeeeally wants something a little more filling than a Milky Way.
F) Jere rips down from work cubicle picture of yankee Stadium scoreboard, showing 22-0 Indians win, during ALCS, because even though it seems like a good idea at first, he's tired of looking at that stupid facade (even though he'd drawn cracks in it to try to make it easier to look at)
G) Jere claims yankees are "wasting their runs for the rest of the series" while sitting in bleachers in ninth inning of 19-8 loss in Game 3 of ALCS.
H) Jere refuses to discard Red Sox boxer shorts which have more holes than the yankee pitching staff.
I) Jere wears Red Sox hat every day of season.
J) The Red Sox played really freakin' hard, and never gave up, even though they were in a hole the likes of which no team had ever, in the history of baseball, dug their way out of.

The answer of course is J. (J for Jere, heh heh.) But A through I, and every reason from every other Red Sox fan's personal list were helpful. This probably sounds ridiculous to some people. Like, say, my friend Tim. He hates sports. I respect him for it. Who cares about a bunch of millionaire jocks running around. I probably wouldn't if the Red Sox hadn't been such a big part of my life since birth. I've pretty much given up on all the other sports as it is. Tim always makes fun of people who say "We won!", by saying, "No, THEY won, YOU just sat and watched." And he has a point. But we cheered for this team all year long, all over the country, and we never gave up on them. We helped will this to happen, in meaningless mojo habits and in cheering so loud for this team all year that they fed off of our energy. So thanks, everybody, for doing your part.

I also want to know why if the yankees have a bigger fan base than the Red Sox do, how come when the teams play at Fenway, the crowd is 95% Red Sox fans, but when they play at yankee Stadium, the crowd is no more than 75% yankee fans? (Maybe it's because the "most knowledgable fans in sports" don't "know" when their own team's tickets go on sale.)

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